Saturday, February 18, 2006

I can't count, and my house smells like boiled socks

Sometimes, I'm afraid I'm getting stupider the older I get. Once, I opened an old book to find a study sheet from high school trigonometry folded between the pages, and all I could think as I stared at the sheet was, "Wow, I used to know what this all meant." I wasn't much good at math then - it took me a couple running starts to pass advanced algebra.

But I had no idea I would backslide to the point where it takes me 10 minutes to count 222 stitches, divided into thirds on a circular needle and come out with the same number twice.

Compounding matters tonight, I decided to make split pea soup. But the plastic container of split peas transmogrified into a container of split mung beans (?! I don't even recall buying these. What the hell did I think I'd do with split mung beans?) and let me just say that split mung beans aren't quite doing what split peas do when simmered with onions, celery and garlic. Mostly, they smell like ass. The skins boiled off and are floating on the surface of my "soup" like little beany carapaces, and I think I should have started with a pork hock like my instincts told me to.

Off to salvage soup and sweater.

8 comments:

Aprilynne said...

OH sad, sorry =) I have to count and recount, too, though, and I AM good with math! Just easily distracted and forgetful. I hope your soup tastes different than it smells........whyaaaah.

Aidan said...

74.

The only time OCD comes in handy.

Sorry about the bean situation. One question...do they smell like canned ass orfresh ass? (You'll have to read Franklin's blog from the 15th to understand my question!)

I know they smelled like ass -- how did they taste?

meg said...

I'm afraid to eat it, so offputting was the distinctive aroma. And more like reconstituted ass, not canned, btw.

Aidan said...

When I cook with reconstituted ass, I usually add lots of onion and garlic. And sometimes cumin, coriander, and a little cayenne. They go a long way to cover the assy taste.

Thorny said...

Ooh, I know just what you mean on feeling stupider. A while back I came across all these lab reports I'd done for biology classes in college. I sat there staring at all these complex Latinate words and finally said to Caz, "Um... I think this had something to do with mushrooms." (It was a plant-y biology class.)

knit_chick said...

Don't feel bad. I can't count either (and it's usually waaaaay less than 222 sts).

the fiddlin' fool said...

When I had to cast on 343 stitches for Rosemarkie, I found it very helpful to put stitch markers every 50 stitches until I got the color patterning in place. It preserved my sanity more than once.

Eldronius said...

Oh my...I almost choked on my tilapia fillet while reading this. *cries with laughter* Boiled ass, eh?